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Full Metal Christmas December 25, 2006

Posted by daveintexas in Current Events.
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It’s probably old.  Still, I liked it.

I like the strategically timed jingle bells.

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Comments»

1. carin - December 26, 2006

Dave- (responding from days ago) I read that Christmas-tree story when you posted it at ASV way back when – lol :)

As for AOS and their moral degeneracy – well, what can you do ? Most of it is funny, and I can kid along. But, when you start talking about young girls … nope, it’s just not funny anymore.

2. Dave in Texas - December 26, 2006

Oh well, you know. Men will be boys. Not everyone suffers from teen-age daughters.

Merry Christmas!

3. geoff - December 26, 2006

That was funny, and it had been a long time since I heard any of the FMJ DI ranting. Good stuff.

4. Gunnery Sergeant Hartman - December 26, 2006

Very funny, Private Joker. You !@#$%^$%C*ing maggot.

5. steve_in_hb - December 26, 2006

I used one of these to motivate coworkers and myself during dragging afternoons.

http://www.rleeermeystore.com/gusgtrleeer1.html

Also Dave, I’d like to apologize. I think there was a major misunderstanding yesterday. We sent our pro team down, but a number of factors seemed to suggest you fielded a local high school team expecting us to do the same:

– the uniforms
– the play
– the star quarterback flirting with his blonde girlfriend on the sidelines (I liked the way she started pouting towards the end of the game)
– the simplistic blitz packages
– an offensive playbook consisting of 5 plays

6. Dave in Texas - December 26, 2006

Oh how I want to say fuck you steve in hb.

bastard.

argh

7. steve_in_hb - December 26, 2006

Doesn’t really matter. The NFC playoffs will merely select the team for the AFC to defeat in the Superbowl.

Parcells really does have to cut off the whole Tony Romo big man on campus thing though. Or else the Cowboys will turn in to the NFL version of the Lakers – more concern on who’s in the crowd than what’s happening on the court, cutesy interaction between players and celebrities, etc.

8. pajama momma - December 27, 2006

Hey Dave,
Merry couple days after Christmas and almost Happy New Year!
Did you put your crap tree up?

Go Chargers!!!!!!!!!!!!

9. Dave in Texas - December 27, 2006

Parcells could solve the problem faster getting TO to learn how to hold onto a goddam football.

Hey PJM, back at ya. Yes, yes, we did place the Crap Tree in its time-honored location.

10. Nice Deb - December 27, 2006

The question is, has he taken it down, yet? I’m waiting until after New Years when the kids are back at school. I have tons of stuff to put away.

Hey, Dave….I posted this on an AOSHQ thread, but in case you didn’t see it, I saw the perfect gift for you when we (my family) were shopping at Crown Center the other day: a tee shirt with an ominous looking creature with huge, black bat wings on the front. It said, “Don’t make me unleash my flying monkeys!”

I always think of you when I see flying monkeys. You and your flying monkey airport.

11. Dave in Texas - December 27, 2006

Nice Deb.

You must give me the link.

I shall have it, the preciousssssss…. it shall be mine. Oh yesssss.

Crap Tree still up. Stays up till NYD

12. Nice Deb - December 27, 2006

I’ve actually looked for the shirt online, because I want to send it to you, and there are several like it but the one at Crown Center is by far the coolest.

We were on our way out, after waiting in a long, long line to see Santa, and another long line to eat at the choo choo train restaurant. My husband wasn’t stopping for anything.

I’d be happy to get it for you, though. Just email me your address.

13. Nice Deb - December 27, 2006

Btw, that Seattle Slough really gets on your nerves. doesn’t he?
Hee hee.

14. geoff - December 27, 2006

We were on our way out, after waiting in a long, long line to see Santa, and another long line to eat at the choo choo train restaurant.

Is that the one where the trains deliver your food using those cool elevator things? My daughter and I ate there a year and a half ago after I helped my brother move in. He’s in medical school out there.

15. Nice Deb - December 27, 2006

Yep, that’s the one. The food’s so-so, the trains are what bring people in. We try to go there at least once a year. My three year old son was absolutely agog.

16. Dave in Texas - December 27, 2006

Seattle doesn’t bother me that much Deb. He’s a typical lib, who’s willing to lie about anything including having a child to make a point.

It’s pretty pathetic when you think about it.

When I think about it, I laugh.

But I am emailing you my address… cause I want that monkey shirt.

geoff wants me to wear it and post my pic in it. I can tell!

17. BrewFan - December 27, 2006

Btw, that Seattle Slough really gets on your nerves. doesn’t he?
Hee hee.

Seattle Slough is the pimple on the ass of life.

18. Anna-Lys - December 27, 2006

I like this site the best.

19. geoff - December 27, 2006

geoff wants me to wear it and post my pic in it. I can tell!

We can get Michael to develop the marketing plan for the unveiling of your new look.

20. Michael - December 27, 2006

I like this site the best.

Damn, Dave! The chicks always like you better.

I hate that.

shopping at Crown Center

You’re in Kansas City?

Great town; Mrs. Michael is from the area. We stayed at the Crown Center not too long ago for a family wedding and had a great view of the Liberty Memorial from our room.

21. daveintexas - December 28, 2006

I just flashed her a smile Michael. Now she’s cookin the dinner.

22. Retired Geezer - December 28, 2006

She asked me to rub on some lotion.

23. Nice Deb - December 28, 2006

Michael,

Women find intelligent men sexy. Also, guys with a good sense of humor. Just be funny, and you’ll have to beat them off with a stick.

I live in the southeast part of the KC metropolitan area.

24. daveintexas - December 28, 2006

Intelligence and humor?

Well, I am kinda funny.

25. Michael - December 28, 2006

southeast part of the KC metropolitan area.

Which puts you in Jackson County. Mrs. Michael’s family used to live north of you, in Clay County. Mom-In-Law Michael worked downtown at TWA. Most of the family has moved elsewhere now.

26. Nice Deb - December 28, 2006

Kinda funny is right, Dave. Which is why the chicks are flocking to this site.

The only reason I go to AOSHQ is because of the guys like you that make me laugh.

You guys in the midwest area should check out the KC Irish Fest which is held at Crown Center over Labor Day Weekend. Great venue, lots to see and do.

27. geoff - December 28, 2006

southeast part of the KC metropolitan area.

My brother goes to the Kansas City College of Osteopathic Medical over on Independence Avenue. At least he will if he’s able to fly out Saturday morning. We’re all hunkering down waiting for the next storm to hit…

[looks out window]

…which it has just started doing.

28. Blue Collar Republican » Blog Archive » Blog Burst December 28, 2006 - December 28, 2006

[…] Full Metal Christmas Santa Brought Me Bullets! The COOLEST gift this Christmas! […]

29. pajama momma - December 28, 2006

Ok Dave, I’m a total tard. I just scrolled down and saw your crap tree most. duh.
Had a lot going on lately, my mind is not in the right place.

30. pajama momma - December 28, 2006

see, I told you I’m out of it……….that would be crap tree post

31. daveintexas - December 29, 2006

nah, you’re pregnant.

my wife’s OBGYN used to ask her “anything going on that I can do anything about”?

I thought that was funny as hell. She, not so much.

32. pajama momma - December 30, 2006

Honestly not to be a downer or anything, but I had a D&C the Wednesday before Christmas. There was no heartbeat. That’s why I’ve been on the internet so much lately. I’m “resting”

Seriously I’m ok, so don’t get all gushy on me or anything, k?

33. lauraw - December 30, 2006

Oh honey. I’m so sorry.

34. pajama momma - December 30, 2006

Dangit, don’t get mushy or I’ll cry!

35. geoff - December 30, 2006

Sorry to hear that, PM. Please let us know what we can make DaveinTX do to make you feel better.

If you want, I could take you out troll-bashing. It wouldn’t be like a date or anything. Just a distraction and chance to get some frustrations out. Plus it’s good for the environment.

36. pajama momma - December 30, 2006

I think Dave should let me swim in his pool and supply me with non-stop margaritas. They must be on the rocks with extra salt on the rim.

As for the troll bashing, damn straight I wanna go. This morning has been a kick already. Uh, this is for the environment of course.

37. geoff - December 30, 2006

Wonderful. Then may I recommend this thread? I’ve already put in a little time there this morning, but ergastularius is there still swinging away at the power elite and conservatives.

38. Dave in Texas - December 30, 2006

Ohhhh PJ.

I’m so sorry dear. I promise not to be mushy anymore.

Margaritas on the rocks, extra salt, and you get to wear the pool boy’s pith helmet. And you have to wear my Wayfarers. And you have to wear your hair in a ponytail!

Afterwards we all fire up some Van Halen and Fabulous Thunderbirds and some of those videos from the Sun Kings and dance and yell and piss off the neighbors!

WHO’S WITH ME?!?!?!

39. geoff - December 30, 2006

That would read better had I written:

“but ergastularius is still there swinging away at conservatives and the power elite.”

Gotta work on my copy if I’m going to be giving these tours.

40. pajama momma - December 30, 2006

. And you have to wear your hair in a ponytail!

Ok, you’ve seen my picture. I know you don’t remember it, but the hair’s just too short for that.

Otherwise. CANNONBALL!!!!!

41. pajama momma - December 30, 2006

but ergastularius is still there swinging away at conservatives and the power elite.”

That’s why you’re calling him erg. I get it. Isn’t that a fish classification?

42. Dave in Texas - December 30, 2006

A short pony tail. Teensy will work.

C’mon. We got to do that VAW-116 thing here, and you gotta have a short ponytail.

https://daveintexas.wordpress.com/2006/12/06/those-crazy-squids-pumpin-it/

43. geoff - December 30, 2006

That’s why you’re calling him erg. I get it. Isn’t that a fish classification?

An ergastularius was also the head slave who helped supervise the other slaves in Roman times. It’s part of his theme that conservatives and liberals alike are trapped in the web of the power elite, making us all slaves.

44. pajama momma - December 30, 2006

Fine, I’ll wear a ponytail, but no laughing!

geoff, thanks for the translation. I swear feel more ignorant everyday.

45. geoff - December 30, 2006

The funny thing about erg is that no matter what name he uses, you can tell it’s him within a few comments. I don’t know why, but he cannot hide his identity.

46. Dave in the Punch Bowl - December 30, 2006

No laughing.

Cept at erg. geoff can spot him now like a cat turd in a punch bowl.

47. Nice Deb - December 30, 2006

I’m sorry to hear about the miscarriage, PJ. I had one once, too.
If you haven’t already had a good cry, you will. And then you’ll feel better.

48. pajama momma - December 30, 2006

Thank you Nice Deb.

49. swissreplica1 - January 15, 2007

hello, it’s good idea

50. Lex - April 3, 2009

Hey guys check out this new website celebmemorial.com In memory all the celebrities that died it’s got videos and stuff really nice!


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